You always knew this day (loss of a spouse) would come but somehow it never seemed real until the day it finally happened. Decades of marriage knowing that your best friend, your soulmate, was there beside you made anything that life could throw at you tolerable.
This loss, however, is almost more than you can bear so what do you do? No matter where you look, you can still see him sitting in his same easy chair or sputtering with the old car in the garage.
You can see him mowing the grass or talking to the neighbor in the morning as he stepped out to pick up the morning paper. Things will change now and here you are alone trying to absorb the shock. Yes, it’s a difficult transition but there are things you can do to ease you into the next stage of your life.
How to Survive the Loss of a Spouse in Your Senior Years?
The loss of a spouse can be great pain and you need to find the best alternatives for the same. For example, the alternatives can be your family members, children, or close friends. So, after this incident, it’s very difficult to lead a healthy lifestyle.
Now, it’s time to discuss the top ways to survive the loss of a spouse in your Senior years.
1. Spend More Time with the Kids and Grandkids
When you are surrounded by people, you won’t feel so all alone. If your kids live nearby, have them over as often as possible. Maybe the grandkids could spend the night once a week or perhaps you could go along with them to the park or a movie. The key is to spend less time by yourself and more time with the people you still have in your life. They cannot completely fill the void but being with those you love can help dull that aching pain of loss.
2. Have You Thought of Moving?
It could be that the home you shared for so many years is making it harder to let go. There is always something that is going to trigger a memory. That can be a good thing, but it can also keep the pain of loss raw. Unless you allow yourself to heal, that pain will never dull, even over time. Perhaps you could move to an assisted living Jackson NJ Bella Terra residence.
Here you will be part of a vibrant community; even though you have your own apartment, you will not be alone. You will have friends and peers, many of whom have gone through what you are now experiencing. It could be a new beginning for you to leave the memories where they belong: in the past.
3. Stay Busy
One of the best suggestions offered by other seniors who have gone through the pain you are experiencing now is to stay busy. You could volunteer at the local library or perhaps go to bingo with friends who have been asking you for years to join them.
What about finally learning to play mahjong with a group of friends or movie night at the senior center?
Suffering a loss like this after decades of being ‘the other half of a relationship is one of the deepest pains you will ever experience. Unfortunately, no one can tell you what will help you because we each experience loss differently.
The Final Thoughts
The best advice is to stay busy and perhaps alter your scenery just enough so as not to be bombarded with constant reminders of the past. By learning to let go you can also learn to move forward, and that’s just what he’d want for you – a life free from pain and sadness. Hold onto that so you can begin to heal.